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Right Up My Alley
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on March 05, 2008
A reader sent me a link to a story about a Japanese woman who was accused of kicking a hole in some guy’s door, crawling through the hole, and destroying his property. She was acquitted when the court realized that her breasts were too big to allow her to fit through the hole.http://mdn.mainichi.jp/national/news/20080304p2a00m0na028000c.htmlIn other words, if the tit doesn’t fit, you must...
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Dilbert.com Redesign
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on April 24, 2008
Recently we redesigned the Dilbert.com web site and added a ton of features, such as animation, deeper archives, mash ups, and more. The reaction from readers has been fascinating.www.dilbert.comLet me get this out of the way: I realize the Beta version of the web site has lots of issues. It’s overloaded with Flash, slower than it needs to be, and the navigation is confusing. We’re fixing...
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America’s Favorite Pastime
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on April 27, 2008
Yesterday I went to a Giants baseball game. It was Little League Day, so there were about ten thousand young boys running wild in the stands. It was also free bat day, courtesy Bank of America. I will pause while you digest this concept.Do you know what happens when you hand an 8-year old boy a new bat, sit him behind the exposed heads of several adults, and ask him to sit patiently for four...
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One Word
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on January 17, 2008
Suppose you had to pick one word to describe yourself. Your first reaction, I assume, is that it is impossible. You are so many different things, in so many different contexts. No one word can capture more than a tiny...
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A Golden Age
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on January 09, 2008
One view of the near future is that terrorists will get nukes and set the atmosphere on fire, or global warming will kill us all, or bird flu will create a pandemic, or the world economy will melt down, or...
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The Hit Song You Wrote
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on January 23, 2008
The other day I asked you to contribute nonsense lyrics that could be combined into a hit song, under the theory that many hit songs have nonsense lyrics, so writing them can’t be that hard.A band in Germany, called RIVO DREI (http://www.rivodrei.de/en/) picked out the best of your nonsense lyrics and strung them together to create an actual song that is a sure hit. The random lyrics sound...
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How to Get Elected President
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on January 27, 2008
I wouldn’t want to be president. I worry enough about being assassinated for what I write on this blog. There’s no point in making it worse. But that doesn’t stop me from thinking about how I would run my campaign. If I ran for president, I’d have to get past the country’s distaste for atheists. That’s a big problem. I would handle it by manipulating the media with a sound bite so...
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Majority Rule
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on January 29, 2008
In a recent post I said that if elected president I would support the majority view for social issues. Readers jumped all over that as a recipe for oppressing minorities.Would that oppression happen?Most Americans are not gay, but the majority supports gay rights. Most Americans don’t want to kill themselves, but the majority favors legal euthanasia. Most Americans don’t use drugs, but still...
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Make Your Own Conspiracy Theory
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on February 03, 2008
I don’t believe conspiracy theories, but I enjoy thinking them up. For example, I always wondered why there was no conspiracy theory blaming Rudy Giuliani for planning 9/11 as a way to become president. I’m sure he didn’t, but if you were writing the movie, that would be the twist ending. In fact, the TV series Heroes had a similar plot. No one had more to gain from 9/11 than Giuliani did,...
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Things That Make Me Happy
via The Dilbert Blog by Scott_Adams on February 07, 2008
As I have mentioned before in this blog, I love reading stories about scientific or medical breakthroughs that seem at first promising but are virtually guaranteed to be utter crap in the long run. I find that I can generate enough artificial belief in the here and now that I get a little serotonin rush. And I like it.My favorite example lately is the guy who appears to have invented a machine...
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